Post Wedding Blues
Yes! And No…
Speaking to lots of our brides, we often hear ‘what do I do now?’, ‘I’m going to help a friend plan her wedding’ and ‘how quickly before we can renew our vows?’.
It’s not unusual and it’s completely fine to feel slightly lost after your wedding day. You’ve dedicated so much time to making one day of your life perfect that it’s only natural. However, the post-wedding period also comes with its fair share of reliefs. So here are some of the most common woes and pros to prepare for after you say ‘I do’.
Woes:
You’ll never wear a wedding dress again! Still watching Say Yes to the dress and wishing you’d tried on one like that? Yep, it happened during the wedding planning process and it will carry on afterwards.
When again will you have all the people you love together in one room? People make the effort for weddings. They’ll fly in from far and wide to watch you say ‘I do’. They’ll put up with driving across the country, getting early trains, hotel bills and buying new outfits. Your divorced parents will even be civil with each other for one whole day all because they know how important your wedding day is to you and to them. When else will this happen? Probably never.
You’re no longer planning something that means you can pin to your heart’s content. So much of your time has been spent trawling through Etsy for every possible cake topper that ties in with your theme, spending your evenings with one eye on the TV and one eye in wedding mags, feeling contented and excited for what the future holds. Most new husbands find their houses redecorated soon after their nuptials – I wonder why?
You may find yourself dwelling on regrets. This doesn’t mean that your day was any less perfect. It just means that now you’ve done it and seen what it’s like from the other side, you may wish you’d change a couple of things. There may be people you only invited to the evening but as time went on, you wished you’d invited them to the whole day. You may have not asked someone to be bridesmaid because you were worried about having an even number of bridesmaids to groomsmen. There may be something you decided to save money on but now wish you’d gone all out (not that anyone would have noticed other than you!). It happens. Just remember, it doesn’t mean your wedding day wasn’t the best day of your life!
The financial hangover. With all the last minute add-ons that you weren’t expecting, hadn’t budgeted for and probably ended up on a credit card, you spent how much???? Yeah but, it was so totally worth every single solitary penny.
Did you like your maiden name? If you’ve been traditional then you’ve probably taken your new husband’s name, but it’s ok to miss your old name! Do you fondly remember when you last signed with your maiden name? Are you crying as you tear up your old bank cards? Double barrelling your name may be the way forward for you…
Reliefs:
You’ll never have to obsess over the weather app again! Did you plan an outdoor wedding or a drinks reception on the terrace? Were you constantly looking to see what Mother Nature was going to throw at you on your big day? Worry no more. The next time you have to worry about the weather is when you’re praying for sun on your next holiday. Bliss.
You no longer have to worry about everyone else’s opinions. Did your mum get way too involved with the colour of the napkins? Did Aunt Edith refuse to sit next to your second cousin once removed because they didn’t pass her the gravy quick enough one Christmas? Now you can stop worrying! Your life and decision-making processes are once again your own (umm and your husband’s now too).
There’s no more pressure. Let’s face it, we all feel a bit of ‘will everyone enjoy the day’ anx. Although this is your day and it’s all about what you and your fiancé want, you still want everyone to have a good time and enjoy the fruits of your labour. There’s no need to worry anymore. It’s done and indeed everyone did have a blast!
There are no more sleepless nights! It’s all ok!! Your photographer did turn up, you didn’t end up walking down the aisle naked or late, the best man remembered the rings and no one objected to you getting married. So do yourself a favour – go to bed and sleep. For a long, long, long time.
You’re no longer constantly emailing. You can actually look at your emails without dread thinking, I really need to get back to them, I really need to email the venue with those 20 things I forgot to ask them yesterday when I asked them 30 other things. You can just delete your spam and reply to your auntie’s email and then put your phone down. Lovely!
These are all possible feelings you may experience after the big day. So now we’ve warned you – make a plan!! Ensure that there’s a hobby for you to get stuck into once the wedding is over. Space out opening your cards, gifts and reading your guest book over the coming weeks to make the memories last as long as possible. Turn looking at your professional photos for the first time into more of an event with your new husband. See writing your thank you cards as a bit of closure and look forward to the next chapter as husband and wife and all the joys that brings.
